It just occurred to us that perhaps we’ve been weaving the wrong narrative over this Chris Brown v. Drake thing.  Chris Brown sent a bottle of champagne to Drake. Drake, supposedly, sent a note back which read, “I am fucking the love of your life.” This, as has been widely reported, is taken as a reference to Rihanna, a woman once linked to Chris Brown and currently maybe having sex with Drake. So if read that way, “fucking” is a present particple. What was Drake doing? He was fucking Rihanna, who is the love of Chris Brown’s life. But, what if we take “fucking” to be, as it often is, an expletive. This changes everything.

Think of it in the same way as saying, “I am fucking awesome!” If we take “the love of your life” as a noun, and therefore, the direct object of the verb “to be,” one must read Drake’s note, eliding as one grammatically can an expletive, as “I am [fucking!] the love of your life.”  And so, though blood was shed and images Tweeted, perhaps the fight at WiP wasn’t about Rihanna at all. It was just two guys, some bottles and a somewhat unclear love letter.